I read this very interesting article about loving a person.
It says that there are five languages of love or simply the ways of showing you love a person. And the object of your affection responds to the language that appeals to him or her the most. They believe that you love them once they see you do one or a couple of these things.
What are these five ways?
1. giving gifts
2. spending time
3. service
4. physical touch
5. communication
Giving gifts - some people appreciate receiving gifts. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not implying that your loved ones are materialistic but it simply means that for them the language of love is in giving or receiving for that matter. If they see you making the effort to give them something, they love you all the more for that because to them giving equals loving. See what I mean? So if you give, it is a sign that you love them. It is the language of love that they understand the most. It doesn't matter if you give them a rare pink diamond or a common single rose. The value of what you give doesn't count here but the act of giving itself. Giving in the long run is not merely an act but a way of imparting our selves to others. So give and you will be blessed with love abundantly!
Spending time - some of our loved ones respond most or appreciate you more if you spend time with them. They believe that they are precious because you find the time to be with them. It is not necessarily the quantity of time but quality time. There is a huge difference between the two. You may spend 24/7 with that person and they still don't feel loved. Quality time is spending time with the loved ones, even just a few minutes a day, affirming your love to them by words or actions or even sharing comfortable silence. Indeed, silence could speak volumes. Show your love make them feel loved every time you spend with them and they will love you all the more for it.
Service - I am not referring to the over-the-top, grand kind of service. Service is simply helping a loved one. It could be carrying the luggages for her or him. The shopping bags. Running errands. Picking up the laundry on the way home. Opening the door. Making a cup of coffee. Anything, even the simplest things that make life a bit comfortable for him or her. Some people appreciate these more than diamonds or other expensive things. So don't forget service as a way of expressing love.
Physical touch - your loved one could be the kind who loves holding hands, kissing, touching the arm, hugging, etc., etc. The etcs. mean I am giving you room to be creative. Let's face it touch is one of the most important love language. It is probably the most basic too. Who doesn't want to be hugged or kissed or hold hands with? But some people want it more or at a higher degree than others. So if your loved one prefers physical touch as an expression of love, it doesnt hurt to hug or kiss her/him every now and then.
Communication - they say communication is the lifeblood of every relationship. It's true. It can create havoc or bliss on your relationships. Some loved ones prefer communication as a way of demonstrating your love to them. They love to hear ' i love you' or be told that they are beautiful or that you love them just the way they are. Just a few words from you could feed their hunger for love. So, communicate LOVE. Say it. Don't let the person guessing. They might not respond to actions or gifts. But simple ' i love you' could do the trick!
There you go. The five secrets of loving and expressing love. Hope the object of your affection will finally understand what you've been saying all along and respond accordingly. It doesn't hurt to try them. Go on and spread love!
1 comment:
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